Scrotesque With A Side Of Fries

by BUTTSKANK

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1.
12:33
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16:04
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13:21
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13:08
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16:58
8.

about

A two-hour-long journey of hunger in which Adam and Eric go to McDonald's. The adventure is told through dialogue, raps, and shitstorms of interpretive noise. Will someone die in the end? Who knows?

Want to spend money and get this on a flash drive? Of course you do.
crnvrv.bandcamp.com/album/scrotesque-with-a-side-of-fries-vrv04

credits

released July 17, 2015

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Some Memes Indiana

This is the site I use for all of my dumb projects that are either too long or too random to be posted on my soundcloud.

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Track Name: Cheeseburger
[Minimum Rage] (Eric)
Mcdonald's restaurant is a chain of hamburgers
Add a slice of cheese and make that bitch a cheeseburger
Premium chicken wraps is what I am all about
And this chicken rap is premium 'cause you're paying for this album

What? This album is pay what you want?
So they don't have to pay anything; they can just get it for free?
Shit, I need a job..

My first job was a Mcjob. Yes it was
I worked at a Mcdonald's for like three months
Spent all my money on McFood and McSodas,
Pokemon cards, and a wall decal of Yoda
At least I know now how much salt to put on fries
The answer is none. Throw it all into your eyes
'cause your wastin your time at 7.25 an hour
I'd probably make more money if I actually sold this album

Seriously, why did I make it so people could download it for free?
I know I'm being nice and all, but I've got $27 to my name right now...
So, why should I make it pay what you want?
Oh yeah, that's right, because nobody wants to pay for this shit.
Just like nobody wants to pay for my wages.
Especially not McDonald's.

(chorus: Adam and Eric)
Somebody once told me they were gonna enroll me
in Mickey D's orientation.
And all my coworkers were dumb with their fingers in their bum,
so I made this album just to spite them.

Scrotesque 2014!!

[Cheeseburgers] (Eric)
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Put a slice of cheese on hamburger and call it cheeseburger
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Now that meat and cheese just tastes like Jesus. I love cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Put some mustard, ketchup, onion, pickle, cheese, and then the meat
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Take a dollar out and scream and shout, "I want a cheeseburger!"
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
They are so fantastical, majorly magical, happiness on a bun
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Why not make me twenty and I'll eat twenty? It's only twenty bucks.
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Just make me a burger won't you please and then just add some cheese
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
If my kid one day wants hamburgers I'll say no you want cheese
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
I'm not prejudiced against the rest, but cheeseburger's the best
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Now this interlude is kinda rude for interrupting cheese

(interlude)
Cheese, cheese, cheese, please
Cheese, cheese, cheese, please
Cheese, cheese, cheese, please
Cheese, cheese, cheese, please
Cheese, cheese, cheese, burgers
Cheese, cheese, cheese, burgers
Cheese, cheese, cheese, burgers
Cheese, cheese, cheese, burgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
I love me some cheeseburgers
Can you please not tease about the cheese, give me some cheeseburgers
Track Name: McDouble Extra Pickles
[Circumsong] (Adam)
When I was in the third grade, I got fucked by a clown
and I'll never see the day where I forget about his frown, yo
The smell of paint on his face, a red button one could squeeze
Though, when he fucked me in the ass, the only buttons pushed were me
But the biggest memory was how weird his penis looked
I swear to god the skin was massive like a hotdog one could cook
The skin reached to the ground, he's tippin, it didn't feel so bad
So when I thought about it after, I wondered why the boss was mad
I had years to reflect on it, I focused on that other dick
Why didn't it look like mine? Now matter how hard I tried
Yes, I cried and cried and cried.
I wanted to look acceptable
but with just half a penis, one could tell my fear was perceptible
I sobbed to mom and dad, "Why? Why'd you put this curse on me?"
They told me as an ethnic jew, this practice was a part of me
Aspartame, they watered down the entire fucking truth
I don't care about your love, you doomed by whole entire youth

[McTrouble]
Once upon a time a few decades ago
I tasted your fries, they were kinda cold
I loved them, I loved them, I loved them-em-em-em-em
I always eat there, and I guess i liked that
you expanded the, dollar menu
It's soooo cheap, it's sooo cheap, it's sooo cheap to eat, eat, eat

and I heaaaard that, the mcriiiib is back
but I realllllly Just want a classic

I want a mcdouble extra pickles
So give me one right now
Also, I would like one mcchicken
and a coke right now, oh
What's the daily double, can you tell me?
I don't like tomatoes
So please take those off my daily double
And i'd like a double quarter pound
Err, Err, mcdouble, mcdouble
Oh, oh, daily double, daily double, daily double

No mighty wings. And no fish mcbites
Menu's always changing, and I don't know why
You're losing, you're losing, you're losing mon-ey-ey-ey-
Now I heard you moved on from supersize me
salads I won't eat, and neither will he
And won't you see, won't you see, won't you see-e-e-e-e

If it ain't broke, don't fix it
Can't you realize, the big mac's are great. hey!

I knew I was in trouble when I walked in
It's 10:15 nowww
I wish that it wasn't still breakfast
This is a let down, oh
I guess I'll have just a mcgriddle
With a hash bro-own
I wish that it wasn't still breakfast
Now I'm wondering where is my hash brown?
Oh, oh, hash brown, hash brown, hash brown
Oh, oh, mcgriddle, mcgriddle

And the saddest place I’ve eaten in
was a run-down Burger King, so yeah
McDonald’s rules, deliciousness
yeaaahhhhhhhhhh


I want a mcdouble extra pickles
So give me one right now
Also, I would like one mcchicken
and a coke right now, oh
I knew I was in trouble when I walked in
It's 10:15 nowww
I wish that it wasn't still breakfast
This is a let down
Oh! Oh!
Mcdouble, mcdouble, mcdouble
Oh! Oh!
Hash brown, hash brown, hash brown

I want a mcdouble extra pickles
McDouble, McDouble, McDouble
I want a mcdouble extra pickles
Track Name: McFlurry
[Emotions]
Right now, I feel like i'm dreaming
Going to mcdonald's is what i'm needing
Feeling all sorts of emotions
happy, hungry, excited, full of devotion
I eat mcdonald's like it's my religion
Going every sunday morning, confessing to the kitchen
I've seen Jesus, but his name was Jesús
cleaning all the grills full of hamburger juice
I say grace before every meal, saying
"Thank you Mcdonald's, you taught me how to feel"
I pray to the creator of my nearest franchise
What in god's name would I do without fries?
I eat there religiously, i consume spiritually
Every day you see my begging for more
That supersize me guy ain't got nothin on me
mcgangbang that motherfucker, send him over to wendy's

[Adam]
Eric! Eric! Eric!
Come on, wake up!
What the hell? I’m smacking you! How are you still asleep?
You hibernate like a fucking bear. My god!

My god. Eric is out cold
I guess in the time being no one really knows why I go to McDonald’s
I mean god knows I love McDonald’s as much as Eric but I go there for slightly different reasons
I mean, god. How the hell is he still asleep?

Eric’s still asleep, ima let you niggies in
on a secret i’ve been keepin that’ll tell you where I’ve been
Mickey D’s my favorite place I swear to god it’s true
But the reason why for me is a different one than you

I fuckin fuckin fuck those fuckin pattys everyday
fuckin with the ketchup, put these pickles up my ass
put my dick inside the flurry straw and cum the mayonaise
yeah i’m only coming with him so I can cum another day


I'm coming
back from the dead
just kidding, i was only asleep you silly head
I'm not drunk, man, no i'm not smokin pot
I just pulled over in this walmart parking lot
Heard a winter storm warning, screamed loudly in your ear
We've got to get the fuckin bread and milk, ya hear?
I think you might've punched me, i don't really know
But whatever, man, to mcdonald's we go!
Track Name: Quarter Pounder
[Quarter Pounder Rap]
What does it mean to be one fourth pound beef?
Your grandpa’s from china, so you’re one-fourth Chinese
Lift your leg up, doing workouts, call those high knees
Child porn is bad, don’t take pics of kid’s hineys
Public Service Announcement from Eric Swaggy Swooper
The regular is .1 pounds so shove it up your pooper
What the pros are lookin for is that 0.25
One fourth pound man that shit gets me so high..
in cholesterol.

[Cinema Parody]
I could eat you for a lifetime
You're my favorite sandwich
Quarter pounder
You mean everything to me
I always know what I'm wantin
Forever diabetes
Hope you stay on the menu
So my fatness can continue

You are a quarter pound, I could eat you forever
Ketchup, onions, I could eat you forever
You are a quarter pound, a mcdonald treasure
Love you just the way you are, a quarter pound, a quarter pound
quarter pound

The menu spells out your name
Like in a playboy magazine, yeah
Hunger growing
Like my dick reading playboy
You always keep me guessin
How you're a quarter pounder
And what is that dressing?
I think it's actually just mustard

You are a quarter pound, I could eat you forever
Ketchup, onions, I could eat you forever
You are a quarter pound, a mcdonald treasure
Love you just the way you are, a quarter pound, a quarter pound
my quarter pound

Always know how much you're weighin
Always know how much you're weighin
Always know how much you're weighin
Quarter pound, quarter pound, quarter pound

You are a quarter pound, I could eat you forever
Ketchup, onions, I could eat you forever
You are a quarter pound, a mcdonald treasure
Love you just the way you are, a quarter pound, a quarter pound
my quarter pound

[Midnight city parody]
I awoke this morning to the sound of
my tummy rumblin, I got out of
bed, and my stomach shouted
I want a quarter pounder
Man there's just something bout her
got them lovely curves around her
and i couldn't stop but hound her
she's a sexy quarter pounder

Quarter pounder, Quarter pounder, Quarter pounder, Quarter pounder-er-er
Quarter pounder, Quarter pounder, Quarter pounder, Quarter pound Quarter pounder
Track Name: McRib
[The McRib is Back]
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
tell your friends, your fam, even your honey
to go to mcdonald's and spend all your money
the mcrib is here, it won't be for long
go to your mickey d's and sing this song!
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
it's here right now but the time is limited
but it's here now, yes it came back it did
so bite into that sandwich made of pork
whether you live in San diego or new york!
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the---
shit
SHIT
SHIT
IT'S FUCKING GONE
THE MCRIB
WE LOST IT
I...
I don't even know what to say...
(cries)
They say, "it's better to have loved the mcrib and lost the mcrib, than to never have
loved the mcrib at all"
but in actuality, I still have an empty feeling inside
not in my heart, no, but in my stomach
it's a hole that will never be filled
never
now that the mcrib is gone
hey, you know what
You know what i'm gonna do
Fuck the mcrib
I don't need it
I'm just gonna go down to Burger king and get me their barbeque sandw-
HEY ERIC THE MCRIB IS BACK
[gasps]
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
I'm sorry for what I said, mcrib
I was sad that it happened when it did
I got irrational but now you're back until
pork prices get way too high
but until then I'll eat a mcrib!
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
hey everyone the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
the mcrib is back
Track Name: McChicken
[This McChicken (Guitar)]
This mcchicken is delicious
It is satisfying
If you state it's bad
you're lying

Why watch my calorie intake?
I don't care if the meat's fake.
Chicken, goat or llama why start the drama

I ponder, "Mcchicken,
Why are you so finger lickin
good?"

I have eaten too many McChickens
Call 9-1-1
Track Name: Fries And A Large Coke
[The Time of My Life]
Now I've had the time of my life
No, I never felt like this before
Yes I swear it's the truth
And I owe it all to you

'Cause I've had the time of my life
And I owe it all to you

I've been waiting for so long
Now I've finally found someone to stand by me
We saw the writing on the wall
And we felt this magical fantasy
Now with passion in our eyes
There's no way we could disguise it secretly
So we take each others hand
'Cause we seem to understand the urgency

Just remember
I can't get enough of
This could be love

Because I've had the time of my life
No, I never felt this way before
Yes I swear it's the truth
And I owe it all to you, you, you, you, you
dirty bit

I came up here to eat, make a burger make it sweet
I don't want to eat no salads, I just want some chicken meat
Come on let's go, let's lose control
Let's do it all night til we can't eat no more
People waiting in the line, all the workers take their time
We gon get our burgers hot, or I'll slap them with my cock
Yeah my food is hot, the temperature, has got my taste buds getting freakier

I got McRib. McRib baby, I was eatin with my ladies
I didn't come to get sliders, I came to come inside her
by her I mean McDonald's, I love Mcdonald's
If you didn't know that, well faggot, now you know now

cause I'm havin a good time with you I'm tellin you

I've had the time of my life
And I never felt this way before
And I swear this is true
And I owe it all to you
Oh, I've had the time of my life
And I never felt this way before
And I swear this is true
And I owe it all to you, you, you
youuu!
I've had the time of my life
And I never felt this way before
And I swear this is true
And I owe it all to you
I've had the time of my life
And I never felt this way before
And I swear this is true
And I owe it all to you
I've had the time of my life
And I never felt this way before (oh no)
And I swear (no way) this is true (it's true)
And I owe it all to you
I've had the time of my motherfuckin life
And I never felt this way before
I fuckin swear it's the goddamn truth
Now nigger it's cause you